Top Mindset Fears That are Holding You Back


Imagine this.

You have a basement home and you come in one day to find it flooded under a foot of water. So in a panic you call your brother who tells you, “What you need to do is to get a new couch for your living room, that way you won’t notice the flooding.”multiple-feelings

Seems kinda nuts, so you call your best friend who says, “If you get some flowers planted in the yard, no one will notice the funky basement.”

HUH? So you call a trusted advisor who tells you that getting a fresh coat of paint will be the thing that will finally give your house that elevated look that you have been after.

Clearly, this story is insane!

But the parallel here is that often what’s ‘broken’ or holding us back in biz is what’s “underground” lurking out in our unconscious. Yet we tend to want the fast fixes like adding social media or getting a new website, or making some info products. And that’s the $30,000 mistake most people make. I say $30k because I actually had someone who told me she’d spent at least that much growing her biz. She’d gotten coaching, a new website, worked with copywriters and branding experts, and high dollar mentors. But she realized that because she didn’t handle her inner game (aka mindset) she was not able to get the results from investing all that money.

Think about how things are created for a moment.

Everything starts on the inside.

Nature moves from the inside out.

So then doesn’t it make sense that if you want to have financial growth, you’d first need personal growth?

In this article I’ll share the 5 fears that keep your money from flowing in.

...doesn’t it make sense that if you want to have financial growth, you’d first need personal… Click To Tweet

By the way, if you have some (or many) of these, be gentle with yourself. It’s not about shame or blame. It’s about awareness. Because you can’t change something you don’t acknowledge. Let me share with you what they are, and how they hold you, your business and your earnings back.

Fear of being seen – Want to know if you have this one? Schedule a photo shoot or get someone in front of you with a video camera asking you to share how wildly brilliant you are. Bam! This will be in your face quickly if it’s one of your barriers. It comes from childhood patterns of learning to play it safe, not make waves, trying to fit in, and often looking for others for your answers. But here’s the deal…when you become an entrepreneur you MUST BE A LEADER! (Tweet this!) Your ideas will want to push you out in the forefront. Your team will need a leader, and your tribe will only trust you if they can SEE YOU! They need to see your positions, your bold ideas, your goof ups, and your stand on things. Hiding out and playing safe are the things that repel money.

Feeling like you are a fraud – Two years ago when I decided to host the Breaking Down to Break Free telesummit and ‘out my story’ of the past financial challenges I had in committing EVERYTHING to be on this entrepreneurial path, my first thought was, “What are people going to think? What if I lose credibility?” We so often judge ourselves harshly because even though we may be able to do it for others, we either aren’t there in business yet, or haven’t been able to make all the pieces work in our own business. Most often it’s far worse in our own heads than it is in the minds of our clients. In fact, from sharing my story I’m hearing from many people that they’d be much more likely now to hire me as a coach because of my authenticity and ability to understand where they are or may have been.

Family beliefs that keep you stuck – When I do muscle testing with my clients to check about what blocks they may have, one of the questions I ask is about whose belief/energy they are carrying. Yes, we carry other people’s stuff! Example – a client was struggling bringing money in. As we explored this she said some statements that totally didn’t sound like her. I said, “Whose is this because that stuff is not what YOU believe.” She replied, “Oh my gosh, this is how my mother feels! I have taken on my mother’s idea about how hard it is and how not right it is to have a lot of money.” If you have some things that aren’t serving or don’t seem like it should be something you believe, check inside and see if you have adopted someone else’s ideas. It is quite common actually and wreaks havoc on business success.

Lack of trust that you can manage big amounts of money – This shows up as a pattern when people have either made and lost money, don’t have the self-trust that they can take care of money, or have family patterns of poverty and lack. This is the story of my colleagues who will have an awesome five figure month and then struggle to pay bills the following two months. Or the one who brings in high ticket sales, only to have people ask for refunds within the week. Here you’ll want to look at your patterns. Does money stay? Does it fly out in seemingly crazy or unexplainable ways? If you inherited a big amount, would you trust that you’d be a great steward of it? Because if you can’t say yes, it’s not coming! Money likes to be taken care of, and if you have fear that you’ll blow it, it will be elusive.

The need for permission – If I had 100 bucks for every person who said that needed permission to do the work they loved in the way they wanted to do it, I’d get one sweet vacation!! This one seems to plague women more, but there’s a strange dynamic of having to ask because we don’t trust our own intuitive guidance. When a client tells me that they don’t know, I challenge that. We ALWAYS know. Now, we might not want to know and stay very disconnected from ourselves so we lack the clarity, but we always have access to the knowing. This permission thing is interesting. Ask yourself if you are waiting for permission. Permission to be successful, make money, leave your old life, succeed more than your parents, etc. If you aren’t giving yourself full permission to have and do and be what you want, there is a loyal little child living inside, staying true to some old, old, old beliefs and patterns.

Can you see with these five barriers how just working on better marketing copy or tweeting more often is not the solution?

As I often say, “The only way around…is through.”  Through the blocks and barriers, and then on the other side is the sweet success and personal fulfillment that you are seeking and is also seeking you!

“The only way around…is through.” Click To Tweet

So first, just notice. Ask yourself if you resonate with any of these fears. Find evidence that they may be lurking around in you. Next, do something different! Often one of the places to start is to go in the opposite direction of what the fear is telling you to do. For example if you have the fear of being seen, book a teleseminar or join a Toastmaster’s club! Remember, the goal is to make the unconscious conscious so you can begin to take charge of your life and create that happy and profitable business! (Tweet this!)

And finally, get support for yourself to make these shifts!

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Therese Skelly is a Mindset Expert and Business Coach who works with mission-driven entrepreneurs. A former psychotherapist, combined with years of marketing/strategy and consulting, Therese offer’s the perfect blend of both “inner game” work and tactical, real world strategies that allow her clients to see the results they desire.



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